The Liberation of 'Good Enough'

Embracing Imperfection

There I was, staring at my screen, agonizing over making a paragraph ‘perfect’. I'd rewritten it seven times, each version equally execrable according to my ever-helpful inner critic, but no better or worse. Suddenly I realized I'd spent 40 minutes on three sentences while the sun was shining and life (and many adorable puppies) passed outside my window. It was an apt reminder of how perfectionism steals our joy while rarely improving our outcomes.

Embrace Imperfection: The Most Elegant Choice of All

Perfection is a mirage—always shimmering on the horizon, never reachable.

I spent years chasing it. The flawlessly organized home. The impeccable presentation. The writing where every word needed to be just so.

What did this pursuit yield? Stress. Delay. Self-criticism. And objects, experiences, and creative works that remained perpetually unfinished because they never quite measured up to the impossible standard in my mind.

The turning point came from an unexpected source—French women.

I noticed how their hair is often un peu messy rather than flawlessly coiffed. How their eyeliner is smudgy rather than a perfectly drawn stroke. How their homes embrace the concept of wabi-sabi—the Japanese philosophy appreciating transience and imperfection.

None of it is sloppy—clearly they pay marked attention to style and detail. But nor is it perfect or stitched-up or uneasy. The apparent effortlessness makes them sexy, allows them to feel bien dans sa peau, and gives them that elusive je ne sais quoi.

This revelation was liberating: True elegance is not about perfection. It's about a certain comfortable authenticity—a gentle acceptance of reality as it is, including our own beautiful imperfections.

I began practicing imperfectionism deliberately:

• Sending emails after just one proofread rather than obsessively checking them many times.

• Publishing writing that felt ‘ready enough’ rather than endlessly tinkering with diminishing returns while binging nervously on peanut M&Ms.

• Making decisions more quickly rather than researching every possible option until I was paralyzed.

• Embracing the charm of slight asymmetry in my home rather than striving for catalog perfection.

The results were remarkable. Not only did I reclaim countless hours, but the quality of my life improved. I felt lighter. (Possibly because fewer peanut M&Ms.) More present. And surprisingly, my work didn’t suffer—in many cases, it improved, infused with a natural quality that perfectionism had stifled.

There's a deeper truth here: Perfectionism is often fear in disguise—fear of judgment, criticism, or not being enough. When we embrace imperfection, we're really embracing ourselves.

In How To Be Elegant, I explore this paradox in Rule 07: Embrace Imperfection. As I write there, ‘If you're seeking elegance through perfection, you will both fail and find unhappiness. Choose instead to write the report well rather than perfectly, to savor the food despite the poor service, to enjoy painting even if your swan looks like a screaming hairy armadillo.’

Where has perfectionism held you back? Is there an area of your life where embracing ‘good enough’ might actually be the more elegant choice? I'd love to hear your thoughts.

To the beauty of imperfection,

Michele

P.S. I hope you find this newsletter ‘good enough’. I’m always looking for the right balance. And next week: THAT two-letter word!